Confessions of Mel... Reach me at melissa_jo27@hotmail.com People who know me should know that though...
There...was....a....shoe...saaaaaale! It was like today was a holiday at WBC!! New shoes for everyone! Boots! Sandals! Loafers! It was a shoe BONANZA!! To top it off, it was the lovely Tanya's birthday. So there were balloons! And fashion shows. Ah, if only all days could be so happy. I got 3 pairs myself. I got a pair of boots. I got a pair of sandals. And I got meself a pair of loafers. I am BESIDE myself. What to wear tomorrow?
Man - o - man. Sometimes I curse the Lord up above for forcing me into blondehood. Yea, I look terrific, but, no brains... none at all. ::sigh:: At least I still have my sanity.
Happy Birthday Tanya!!! Today (actually tomorrow for me, whatever) we get to celebrate your birth! Thank you for being born!
So, I'm thinking about donating my eggs for all the er, uh, 2 of you who dont know. I went to my first examination today where I received an ultra sound. Apparently I produce more folicles than I should, which would mean, after I start on my hormones, produce around 35 eggs. Then I face the risk of bloating to the point where I would need to be drained. But there isnt a HUGE risk of that happening, just more of a risk to me than other girls who are going through this.
I'm getting a very anti-Melissa vibe going on today. Which is fine really, I dont have to work tomorrow, while the rest of my team does. Do NOT forget what I do for you all though. Sales people (warning, I do love each and every person I work with very much) have double faces. I deal with the ugly side. And then watch them all suddenly transform into beautiful creatures right before my eyes when a prospective client comes in. It's annoying. I understand that they are all under a lot of stress. I do what I can to help them out. I bend over backwards, I would bleed out of my eyes if my boss asked me to. It's wearing me out. I can only go on smiling for so long. I'm tired. I'm cranky. I've found a wrinkle! I'm, believe it or not, under a great deal of stress myself, without having to carry their stress with me too.
If I were to have one wish that would come true, it would be to become Sleeping Beauty. Not only do I get to be a beauty, I would get sleep for one hundred years. To be awakened by some hot prince. In tights. Solid. Then the prince and I would go to a party, where my dress would change from pink to blue. And everyone would be SOOOOO happy that the prince and I got together. Because before, the prince thought he was in love with someone else, but he wasnt, he was in love with me. The problem was that I didnt know that I was a princess. Which, of course, I am. A princess. Who has a way with owls and squirrels. And I live with three wacky ladies. Who like pink and blue. And float around a lot. When I'm done dancing at the party where my dress turns blue and pink, I would go to a corner and get sloshed. Because I would have to get married, and I'm starting to have suspisions about my fiance's relationship with his horse. I've also just found out that I will be the princess of France, which really annoys me. Because, I mean, come on, no amount of rest is enough to deal with those wack cases for the rest of my days. So, I would go on a quest to find Aladdin's lamp to wish that I was a receptionist at a career college. I'd also wish that I wasnt so darn beautiful, so stupid prince's in tights would leave me the hell alone. To top it all off, I would wish that I would never get a chance to sleep again. One hundred years is tooo toooooo toooooo long. Now that I think on it, I think my wish did indeed come true both times. And THATS why I'm here. Tonight. Answering phones and not sleeping. It would also explain why France and boys in tights annoy me.
I like fall. Why, you inquire... Haha, the disappearance of mini skirts and belly shirts, I respond. Good old wholesome looks come back in style! Big coats!! Long pants!!! Turtle Necks!!!! and this year, the SHAWL!!!!!! THANK YOU BABY JESUS!! Bring on the holidays, Santa! I'm ready to EAT! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I went on a date last night. It was fun until I watched Spiderman 2 with him. He talked during the movie. To me. BAD BAD BOY!! Not only did he talk to me during the movie, he shoved my arm off the arm rest. NAUGHTY NAUGHY BOY! I'm sooooooo sick of going on dates. How is it that I became THIS picky? And why did I wait so long to see Spiderman 2. Pretty darn good movie. Toby's cute. Once my arm was so rudely shoved off the arm rest I imagined I was on a date with him. To the point where I got jealous of Kirstin Dunst.
I have stressed myself out so bad that I have finally gone crossed eyed. I woke up with crossed eyes. Why? WHY?? I ask you. No one wants to live with me. Which I cannot understand as my roommie and I are witty and adorable. ::sigh:: The only thing that really cheered me up today was a story about a masturbating lizard. Thank you Tanya.
I have nothing to say to you. I'm hung over. It's been a good while since I have been hung over at work though! Darbie wanted to go out. Who am I to say no? We went to Kell's. I drank. I laughed. I wiggled about. When I went home I slept. I had a dream I was on a roller coaster. I think it was because I was so dizzy. One would think I had more than 3 beers, but no, thats just the type of cheap date I am. Man, I could seriously use some cupcakes right now.
Good news! I have managed to convince Darbie to stay in the apartment we are in now! She will be moving into my room once we go to Seattle and get a lofting kit from Ikea. It's a win/win/win situation for me. I've always wanted a loft, I want to go to Seattle, and I dont have to worry about money! Now the actual challenge is finding a suitable roommie. I have joined roommates.com, and so far the only good looking roommates are male. This could get interesting.... And I would like to thank everyone for their input.
One of my roommies (the one with excessive gas) is moving out on Monday. This came outta NO where. So now my other roommie wants to move into a 3 bedroom apartment and take on another roommie. I dont have money to move. Although it would be nice to have my own room... So, my choices, either Darbie moves into my room, and I go on a usual, sharing a room, but having money. OR moving, and digging myself deeper into a hole I want desperatly out of and having my own room. I dont think I have a choice in this matter though. I think Darbie has already made up her mind. Oh! PS, if you dont know me, dont bother giving me advice I dont need........
Is it weird that I already miss summer? Being that it is technically still summer? No. It's not weird. I am in all shape a forms, a normal person. It's dark when I leave work. Boy am I glad I dont live over yonder in Alaska. Although, they do pay you for living there. And as my mother says, its where the odds are good, but the goods are odd (referring, of course, to men). I think thats true anywhere you go. I shall quote something out of boredom now....
Haha, This weekend I we to Salem to pretend I was engaged. Everyone saw through my story though. They all gave me looks. The only person who would talk to me was the lady selling dildos. I ask you, do I look THAT single?
Yes. It's cloudy. Which can only mean one thing.... Its going to be my birthday soon. Haha, yes. In a short, ummm, either 2 or 3 months, hahahaha. ::sigh::
Do you know what is completely useless, stupid, and a bore? Weekdays are. Unless, of course, the weekday happens to be a holliday. Where I dont work. I prefer the hollidays where I get presents also.
You know what I have never noticed before? Peter Jennings is handsome! Yea! He was on a television program about cigarettes last night. Looked pretty interesting. I didnt pay attention to what was being said at all. I think it was about us being screwed over by our government. Or something equally unshocking. Like smoking is bad for you. I just like the graphics on the show. It looked funky when cigarettes were being lighted at an extreme close up in slow motion. I also liked the shots of Peter Jennings looking thoughtful. I think I've only just realized now how incredibly shallow I am. The shallowness makes me not really care though. I wonder if Peter Jennings has a firm BumBum.....
Welcome to the summer 2004 edition of getting to know your friends.. What
"5:50am" says my alarm clock. If you happen to be my neighbor/roommate, you know this not to be true. I have hit my snooze button for 3 solid hours before waking up this past week. I blame my recovery from Vegas among other things.
Abe Lincoln AND George Washington. Aah, to be back in the days where presidents werent so discustingly annoying....
PLATINUM!!!
Village with my roommie Darbie. Gosh, that was a while ago. I liked it, I dont care what anyone thinks!
Well, I like Sex and the City a LOT. Also the Simpsons
It's interesting you ask! Haha, because I actually had Blueberry yogurt and a banana. Oh wait, this isnt interesting at all.
Oh! Haha. Ummmm, any of my past bad dates. Or any of the guys I have rejected. Mostly Glen. Yea, Glen, oi, that would be BAD!
Food
Country, however, not country music.
Vanilla, with goodies in it. Or plain. Or sandwiched between a variety of cookies.
Wait, all of them. All of the above. D. My answer is D. Buttered, salted and plain. Ah, if only it were possible. What a wonderful life it would be.
You are my favorite color. Arent you?
HAHAHAHAHAHA, ummm, a Neon, and she's GREAT. Man, even with the hysterical laughter that was a boring question and answer.
BLT... dynomite!! WATCH ME EXPLOOOOOODE, hunh hunh....
If you happen to know Glen, anything he is or represents.
Chocolate roses. You know, it's chocolate shaped as a rose stuffed in red tin, and sits on a green stick? You eat it.
Ooooh, Europe. France. If only for there cheese selection. I would also bring Betty along with me. To come in touch with her French Pirate Hampster roots.
Er, uh. It's supposed to be beige.
TARGET!!!!
That's an awful long ways away, retirement is. Thinking about it will only make me nervous.
I've been through this before. Not Tuesday! Any day but Tuesday! I like Saturdays quite a bit.
Cried
St. Paul, Minnesota. In a hospital.
November 4th, 1981
Any Olympic Sport, I was so sad to see them go.. I love that Michael, er uh, oh no, I've already forgotten his sweet name...!
You
You
Shout! And Always! And stuff!
Pepsi with a hint of Coke..
I never sleep, havent I told you about my neighbors?
8
I have a hampster. Who reminds me of a French Pirate.
Angela and Christina. So far. I'm sure other people will. And like a little lemming, I will read them all I'll bet.
Dont hate me because I am beautiful; hate me because I think you are ugly. And often times stupid and repetative. gunch. rhymes with lunch. and crunch. and bunch. but gunch isnt a word, is it? nono. it will be now, however. I declare it a word. now alls i need is a definition. it will mean, ummmm, take-out. for example, "Gol Durn! I really dont feel like doing dishes, yet I am in need of food. How about some gunch, kids?" gosh, thats great. I feel like shakespear. But cooler. and wiser. and younger. dont hate me because I am beautiful, hate me because I am a cooler, wiser, younger shakespear. I must go write a play now.
A lot of things annoy me. The fact that a lot of things annoy me annoys me. The person who is talking to me right now is really annoying me in fact. Haha, they have no idea I'm talking smack about them! Haha, she thinks Im listening to her. And I'm not. TAKE THAT WORLD!!!
So, I have to choose either working right now, ooooor writing in my blog. As you can see, I have already made my decision. I like to think of it as practicing my typing speed. I've managed to maintain the weight I lost in Vegas. How, you inquire... Hahhaahaha, by walking, I tell ya, walking like mad. In Vegas. Gosh, it was hot there. And its normal here, but I got used to the heat there, so now I am solidly cold. All around. Always cold. Actually, now that I think about it, I'm always cold, so I'm no different than ever before. OK, I've run out of things to talk about. I'll work now I guess. If I have to. Gol durn it.
I'm really tired. Last night, I was going to my car to collect a few things I had left in there. I opened the door to my apartment....and there was a spider. Not a normal spider, mind you, it was orange and black striped. And HUGE. Just (literally) hanging out at my front door. I'm getting shiveries just thinking about it. I slammed my door shut, and used my patio door to get to my car. No biggy, really. Just walk through some grass outside my apartment. HAHAHAHA, no. The sprinklers turned on. I got all wet. I got the things I needed from my car. Now I was faced with two alternatives. Walk by the possibley armed and dangerous black/orange striped spider or walk through sprinklers and get even more wet. Luckily I am not scared of water....so into the sprinklers Melissa went. To make matters worse, there were a couple of guys visiting my neighbors who watched this whole ordeal. I dont think they think I am normal. Oh ho ho, though, if they only knew....
Vegas is such great fun. My bad moments were fun. My good moments were unforgetable. We did a great many things. My gal pals and I did. We ATE and ATE and ATE. 4 buffets, 4 days. My stomach is STILL to this hour rebelling. If you happen to be going to Vegas in the near future, I highly recommend going to the Aladdin Spice Market. A HUGE variety of foods. Very good, yet very very dangerous. I would also go to the Mirage. Very pretty place. Haha, we drank too. Not as much as I thought we would, but a great deal all the same. The Rum Jungle was GREAT. At one point of the night, I remember my hand resting on some girls boob (accidently, it was crowded, afterall) my foot on some other guys toe, and two dancers twirling over head. Rain has awesome special effects (fire balls, my FAVORITE). Ghost Bar, great view maybe if it werent so windy. The wax museum was good for some giggles, as you can see from my picture book blogs from below. The Treasure Island show, very very dirty. But honestly, I like anything with fire ball effects. I'm still tired. I dont know if I am ready for work. Although, I am ready to walk down the street with out hearing a whole lot of cat calls, thats for sure. Vegas boys are AGGRESIVE. I felt bad for Sona especially. hoo boy.
