MONKEY maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.

I like bread and butter. Oh I like toast and jam. Thats what my baby makes me, because I'm his lovin' MONKEY woMAAAAAAAAAAAN.

I really do like toast and jam!! Who doesnt. Atkins?? Haha, he bit the dust. Who cares 'bout him any longer.

I like monkeys too. I wouldnt want one though. I'm scared enough to approach my hampster. She's so big now. With gigantic teeth. She shows me everyday. It's almost like she says "Har Har Har, you like my gigantic teeth, Melissa? If you thought my biting you before was bad, how would you like it if I bit you now?? With my GIGANTICO TOOPHERS??? Har har har har har har har. Now... give me a carrot!"

She really is scary. Not only does she look french, she looks like a french pirate. I want to put an eye patch on her. Except that means I would have to get awfully close to her.

At this time, I would like to sing a song to my hampster, Betty.
You freakin' scare the crap outta meeeee
Freaky French Pirate Hampsteeeer eeeeeeeeeee.